Money is one of the most common sources of conflict between married couples. Indecision about everything from big goals to little purchases can be a source of friction between you and your spouse. If you are recently married, about to be married, or have been married for a bit and are struggling to get on the same page financially, this article is for you.
We are going to highlight the most important tips for managing finances as a newlywed couple. There are many things that you will need to discuss with your spouse to get a better idea of where you differ and what similarities you have when it comes to finances.
Big topics like separate and combined bank accounts, monthly budgets, and goals all need to be talked about at length. Keep in mind that you likely won’t be able to knock this all out in one conversation. To maintain patience and make the best decisions you can as a couple, consider setting aside an hour or so once a week to discuss these topics bit by bit. It’s also important to revisit these discussions regularly to make sure you are still on the same page with your spouse.
Remember, there is no rush to have it all figured out immediately, though these tips can help you set a solid financial base for your marriage and your future.
Discuss Combined and Separate Bank Accounts
An excellent starting point for big financial decisions as a married couple is deciding whether you want combined or separate bank accounts. Each option comes with its own pros and cons. There is no single correct answer – it all depends on what you both think will work best for you.
Combined accounts
Pros: helpful for tracking all expenses and paying bills.
Cons: lack of privacy and unplanned purchases may become a source of conflict.
Separate accounts
Pros: more privacy with transactions, managing individual debts
Cons: it may be more difficult to manage joint expenses and bills
If neither of these options sounds right for you and your spouse, you may also consider having both separate and combined accounts. It may be more of a challenge to manage, but once you have discussed all of the important topics in this article, you will likely feel more confident in your ability to oversee both separate and combined accounts, which gives you the best of both worlds in terms and privacy and convenience.
Decide on a Monthly Budget
Once you have decided on how you and your spouse will manage your bank accounts, it’s time to move on to your monthly budget. Discussing your monthly expenses and choosing a budget to stick to is imperative to future financial well-being.
For this section, you will want to start by sitting down together and writing out your monthly expenses. Essential transactions like rent/mortgage, utility bills, and insurance will go here. These are things that need to be paid every month.
Next, you will try to ballpark your other planned expenses (groceries, gas, subscriptions.) It may help to take a look at past transactions to get a better idea of the amounts for each.
After you have calculated all of that, consider how much you would like to have for miscellaneous spending like going out for dinner or the movies or to a museum. It’s important to make room for fun activities, or else budgeting and saving may feel like too much of a chore. Just because you have a budget doesn’t mean you can’t splurge every now and then!
Articulate Savings Goals
After you have outlined a budget with your spouse, the next thing to discuss will be your savings goals. These will all be shaped by the types of goals you have as a couple and as individuals – both short and long-term! Maybe one of you wants to buy a new car next year, and maybe you want to take a trip together in the fall. Now is the time to start a discussion about savings goals. I’m sure it won’t be the first discussion – or the last!
It is important to consider your emergency fund as a couple. It is recommended that you save enough to cover 3 to 6 months’ worth of expenses. Once you meet that goal, then you can move on to other goals.
Long-term goals will look a lot different from short-term goals, and it is important to plan for both and choose how much you and your spouse will contribute monthly to them, whether it be 50/50, on a sliding scale, or some other way you can both agree on. The most important thing is to make it realistic to your spending habits. The harder your goals are to achieve, the more likely it will be that you will throw in the towel. Like the miscellaneous spending you should budget for each month, it is important to choose goals that are achievable without calling for a large amount of sacrifice.
