If you have the honor to plan the bride’s bachelorette party, I have three words for you: it’s rager time.
And by rager time, I do mean exactly what the bride requested, not stepping out of bounds and planning an event she might be uncomfortable with because you thought you knew better.
If you think all bachelorette parties consist of strippers, unlimited alcohol, and a penis-shaped pinata, I’ve got some news for you: uhm…they don’t. With the way Hollywood portrays them in films, it’s almost impossible not to think of Vegas, dance clubs, and blacking out by the end of the night with no recollection of anything the next morning.
I mean, really? That’s just dramatic. If I were ten years younger, maybe it would’ve sounded a tad appalling, but nowadays, even applying eyeliner is an exhausting feat.
So, maid of honor, what tasks must you complete on your path to victory? They’re mainly common sense stuff, so no worries, but before we dive in and explain the do’s and don’ts, it’s fair to mention the bride’s role in this situation, so put the bride on.
The bride must be notably clear on what she expects of the party. For example, do you want this party to be a “let’s get lit” party or a “spa day at the Hamptons” party? Is there a particular theme you had in mind? If you have something specific in mind like flying off to Nevada to get the full experience, are your friends financially equipped to make it happen? You don’t want to put your loved ones in a position where they may feel guilty if they don’t pitch in. Be attentive when making your decision.
Is alcohol permitted, and if so, how much is too much? If there will be people who don’t drink alcohol attending, what other drink alternatives are available? If you’re planning on hiring strippers, will your significant other be comfortable with that? Who exactly is permitted to come? You clearly can’t invite all your girlfriends, so which ones will be the chosen ones?
It may sound stressful, but communication is critical here. Don’t expect the maid of honor to figure this all out on her own! Her planning is solely based on your expectations!
One more thing. The bride’s job is not to plan or micromanage this event. Are you listening? The bride’s job is not to plan or micromanage this event. Don’t be that bride. With few considerations in mind, let your maid of honor know what you expect, and she’ll take care of the rest.
Now, MOH, here are your don’ts.
Don’t go against the bride’s wishes. No strippers mean no strippers. This isn’t some cliche bridesmaids film where they end up arranging a stripper, and the bride becomes weirdly ecstatic. Yeah, no.
Your bride’s decisions may be based on her partner’s comfort as well as her own. She will be annoyed if you take matters into your own hands. If you feel like a steamy fireman is what the party needs, then feel free to throw your own bachelorette party or hire them on your own time.
Don’t wait until the last week before the wedding to plan the party. For many brides, the wedding is the most joyous day of their life but also the most stressful! This event will destress her as much as possible before she falls back to her hectic daily planning.
Don’t make the bride wear anything she doesn’t want to, whether it’s something as simple as a t-shirt or a hat with a penis coming out of it. If she says no, it means no. Her consent is everything because this is her party. Your only job is to make her as happy and comfortable as possible.
Last but not least, don’t send invitations out last minute. Be smarter than that.
Now, for the do’s.
Do communicate with the bride, her partner, and the guests. Once again, communication is key here. It’s not a bad idea to check in with the bride if you’re questionable about something. You can also check in with her partner to see if they’d like to pitch in something or plan a surprise. Keep your guests up to date with the details and make sure they know the party’s time, place, and date.
Also, if guests need to pitch in more money, let them know ahead of time, because not all may be able to afford it. Take advantage of lower airfare if the event is overseas.
Do plan activities to keep the party alive. If you’re hosting a low-key type of party, then activities are a must. If you think you can wing it when the party begins, think again. What activities you pick are the difference between a great or lame party.
Do take tons and tons of pics. It’s still a party after all! A great idea? Creating a scrapbook for the bride and presenting it to her on her wedding day! Bad idea? Posting the pics on social media without her consent… Be careful in the choices you make with the pictures you take!
Do take it easy and have a great time. In the end, it’s all your closest girlfriends celebrating love and life. Follow these few simple rules, and you’ll have nothing to worry about.